I Love Sasha Grey

Well, she doesn’t have a problem. Me, I’m an alcoholic and I don’t care. But I was just thinking something. Ms Grey just turned 21 years of age. She started porn at 18. So for three years in the business, she legally couldn’t drink booze. So what’s a girl to imbibe when you end up with anal warts and want to drown your sorrows? Cum Fart Cocktails of course. “What are Cum Fart Cocktails you might ask? It’s a load of hot, slimy ball-snot that’s cock-injected into a young girl’s asshole for added flavoring, and then noisily farted into the open mouth of her girlfriend, who eagerly swallows it. Yum!”

Food for thought, so to speak. I’m still trying to get that enema drinking story ready, stay tuned.

This is what you get for being bad! Oh, wait a minute… she likes it. (Like Mikey).

Finally. NOT Godard. Although that’s not a bad idea. I love how the recent big budget porn flicks feature the disclaimer “Not the” in order to indemnify themselves. There’s “Not Bewitched”

Which is allright but kind of silly. But I think Sasha looks cuter dressed up in little Vulcan ears, especially with cum all over her face, but that’s a given.

BTW there is a whole genre of Star Trek porn but I won’t get into that right now because it’s way more disturbing than anything on this blog.

Ready for another quick mind-melt? Check out Sasha’s Myspace page. Just for fun, let’s take a quick look at her profile and what she wants you to know about her. Her musical tastes are not bad (anotherpost about this later) - the usual eclectic mix worthy of any Silver Lake hipster, with some classic rock and death metal thrown in for good measure. She seems rather knowledgeable about popular music for her age, although I must say, seeing Joy Division as the first band on the list made me worried that she may be suffering from depression. I hope not.

She likes Throbbing Gristle and Psychich TV. In fact she likes them so much she really wants to meet Cosey Fanni Tutti and invites “Sleazy” (I am assuming that IS Peter Christopherson she is referring to and not another porn guy) to fuck her boyfriend in the ass. Very po-mo. Cosey makes sense since she also did porn back in the art school days.

I won’t go through the film list again because I’ve got Godard coming out of my ears and will now forever associate him with Sasha, but she DOES include John “Buttman” Stagliano in the same list as Louis Malle, Bertolucci and Agnes Varda. (Who knew!)

Now come the books. There’s the obligatory hipster hats off to “Ernesto ‘Che’ Guevara”. Sorry but in my book anyone into ‘Che’ is supporting a mass murderer and your stupid t-shirt is NOT fucking cool. Anais Nin, natch. Then come the beginnings of the education of young existentialist: Nietzsche, Yeats… Jean Baudrillard hahaha… I am a bit underwhelmed that she did not include Derrida and Foucault. But she did include JP from whom she probably learned much about being and nothingness. Finally, for the cake taker, she writes “I am ready to take on any opportunities and challenges that face me as a woman, porn star, and artist.” Let’s hear it for art!All in all, it could very well sound like a Myspace profile of a somewhat Goth, somewhat hipster kid attending her first year at an Ivy League school and struggling with boy problems, ‘existentialism’, writing in her journal while listening to the Sisters of Mercy. With one difference. There’s this:

And there’s this:

Ah, that obscure object of desire. Oddly she didn’t mention Bunuel.

Five slightly heterosexual guys slap their dicks around Sasha’s little head, jerk off into a martini glass and Sasha gulps it all down. Take THAT, Jean-Luc!